How to face your inner fear

People often say that if a person is very afraid of something, it is actually the psychological factors that are at work, so to overcome one's inner fear, one must first learn to face one's inner fear. However, although this situation is very easy to say, it is not that easy to do, and it is a challenge for most people. So how do we face our inner fears?

1. Have the courage to face the unknown. Why do we feel fear? Because people's lack of understanding of unknown things can easily lead to nervousness and anxiety. Ultimately, it is because of the limitations of our own knowledge. This requires us to constantly broaden our horizons and understand unknown things. As the saying goes, "You never stop learning." The more you learn and the more you understand, the more you will understand that the so-called "fear of the unknown" is due to your own limitations.

2. Make yourself stronger. Since ancient times, the weak have been submissive to the strong, and the strong have enough power, which is also very important in overcoming fear. You feel fear because you realize your own weakness in your heart. Maybe you haven't realized it on the surface, or you dare not admit it, but it is undeniable that strong people have a greater sense of security than weak people, and will be braver when facing fearful things.

3. Divert attention. When you are afraid, it is easy to concentrate, and your nerves become tense, causing you to feel uneasy and panic. At this time, you might as well try to divert your attention. If conditions permit, you can try watching movies and TV series, remember to choose those that are light-hearted and hilarious. You can also listen to music, choose your favorite singer, listen to soothing tunes, and imagine that the person in your heart is smiling at you. Of course, you can also choose to look at the scenery outside the window, study the falling of a flower, and if all these are impossible, stare at a wall and imagine its history, from the original bricks to the current white walls... In short, ignore the things that scare you and distract yourself.

4. Anticipate the worst outcome and estimate your own tolerance. Generally speaking, we feel fear because we are afraid of the consequences of the unknown. If we can anticipate the worst possible outcome of unknown things and estimate our tolerance, then we won’t be so scared, right?

5. The personality becomes more cheerful. There is a saying that goes, "It is difficult to change one's nature but difficult to change the country." Changing one's personality is a rather difficult thing. This does not mean that you should distort your personality and achieve it overnight. Instead, you should be a little more cheerful based on your original personality and try to accept friends who share the same interests as you. Then you will find that you have endless topics to talk about. In short, friends can make people optimistic and reduce the growth of fear.

1. Say goodbye to the waiting effect and actively communicate

In psychology, there is a psychological effect called the waiting effect. When we are waiting for someone, the passage of time will cause a series of changes in our psychological attitudes.

In TV dramas, many conflicts are triggered by the waiting effect. In my favorite TV series "Tokyo Love Story", when Rika Akaki was waiting for Kenji, she found that he had not come for a long time, so she cried in the long train. She accepted their breakup by crying. I felt so sorry for their relationship at that time, and I wondered if the ending would have changed if Rika Akaki had called Kenji.

In fact, psychologically, the longer a person waits, the more likely he is to have negative emotions and cause inner anxiety. With the development of modern information, when you are afraid inside, we don’t have to be a passive waiter, but we can adjust our status at any time, whether it is making a phone call to communicate or changing our behavior to offset the negative emotions inside.

2. Say goodbye to preconceived impressions

Psychology has found that a person often has a preconceived impression, and once they are hurt by this thing, they will develop a serious sense of fear. This is a very natural psychological state. For example, if a person is bitten by a snake, then some people will be afraid of snakes for the rest of their lives, and they will tremble in their hearts every time they see a snake.

So once we have this impression, how to break the fear in our hearts? We need to go into this memory scene, analyze the reasons for the fear, and find corresponding experts to solve the fear in our hearts. Based on this starting point, we can rebuild our cognition. Generally speaking, fear comes from inner ignorance. When we understand the truth of things more, we will overcome fear.

3. Break the psychological stereotype effect and reshape cognition

The psychological set effect is generally a reflection of our inner biases. When we have a fixed impression of things, we tend to strengthen this tendency in our feelings, perception, memory, thinking and attitude.

Psychologists once conducted an experiment. They showed the same photo of a person to college students. They told the first group of students that the person in the photo was a criminal, while they told the second group of students that the person in the photo was a respected entrepreneur. Then ask them to describe how they feel about the people in the photos. The first group of college students are often described with words such as “ferocious” and “greedy eyes”. The second group of college students described the characters as "intelligent" and "wise", but in fact they were just photos of ordinary people.

Therefore, the inner fear of many people also comes from our psychological set effect. When we think we are in danger, we will become nervous involuntarily. When we learn to truly analyze this dangerous factor rationally, we can face our inner fear correctly.

4. Avoid over-explanation and re-talk to yourself

Some people are born afraid of cats. Even if there is no proper reason to explain it, they will continue to look for it until they find enough reasons. This is what psychology calls the overjustification effect.

The over-justification effect is a compensation mechanism of our mind in psychology. We always believe that there are always various reasons for something to happen. Regardless of whether the reasons are appropriate or not, they like to start from their own perspective and give various speculations.

So when it comes to our inner fears, we can ask ourselves from the most fundamental perspective: why am I afraid? What is the fundamental reason? Many people's social phobia often comes from inexplicable worries, but they forget that the most essential thing is the inner fear that makes them dare not try. Therefore, to break through the inner fear, you must boldly try. Only when you take the first step, you will find that fear is actually a paper tiger.