What to do when you have a bad temper

When facing the problem of bad temper, you must pay attention to learning to better control your emotions, because in life, we don’t want to get along with or communicate with people with bad tempers. It would be better for these people to use the method of diverting attention.

1. Wait for the anger to subside

Studies have shown that anger lasts no more than 12 seconds. Like a storm, it destroys everything when it breaks out, but then everything calms down. Therefore, it is very important to know how to spend these critical 12 seconds and let the anger dissipate naturally. Take a deep breath, or count to 10 in your mind. When you are done, you will find that you are not that angry anymore.

(A word of caution, the best way to count silently is not to count from 1 to 10, but to count like 1-4-7-10-13... Do some addition while counting to wake up your rational brain, shift your attention, and calm your emotions faster.)

2. Take control of your emotions

Putting your emotions in different terms can help you feel more in control. "I'm really disappointed in your behavior." This sentence is more powerful than the "#￥%—*" you say in a rage.

3. Challenge your core beliefs

Ask yourself, "Is it a good thing for my subordinates to allow them to leave early at any time? Is it a good thing for my spouse that I spend every weekend playing golf with clients?" If you are honest, your answer must be, of course not. Recognizing right and wrong is the first step to correcting it.

4. Stay out of it

Imagine a friend of yours who is constantly criticized by his boss, forced to work overtime, or ignored. What is the right response for her? Make a list of possible actions she could take, and then ask yourself why these actions might work for her but not for you.

5. Engage in healthy confrontation

If someone blames you, you can fight back with positive, constructive language. The other person may be surprised or even a little angry at your language. But you know what? They will forgive and get used to your ways. For family and good friends, suppressed anger is often more destructive than anger expressed directly.