What to do when you feel like life is hopeless?

Many people in life have had a similar mentality, that is, they feel that they have no desire to live. In fact, this is a negative mentality. Generally speaking, if this happens, you can put down your work or study, go out for a trip, or participate in more outdoor activities, slowly adjust your mentality, learn to be strong, and learn to relax. In fact, no matter how big the difficulties are in life, they will pass.

There are three main reasons for negative attitudes:

1. Under the influence of the natural environment, people’s expected goals cannot be achieved, so they become pessimistic.

2. Frustration situations caused by social factors. Undoubtedly, its influence is much more widespread and profound than the previous one. Factors such as tension in interpersonal relationships, twists and turns in political activities, difficulties in economic activities, the influence of worldly conditions, human relationships, customs and habits, conflicts of group interests, etc. can all lead to a pessimistic situation.

3. Pessimistic situations caused by the differences between personal internal factors, such as intelligence, physical fitness, physiological condition, psychological condition, etc. and the desired goals.

How to overcome pessimism

1. Appropriate positioning. When we set our goals, we must position them appropriately and our expectations must be consistent with objective reality. For example: Student A’s family income is 20,000 yuan per month, and Student B’s family income is 1,000 yuan per month. Student A wants to buy a suit of clothes with 1,000 yuan, and Student B wants to buy a suit of clothes with 100 yuan. Student A only spends 1/20 of his income, while Student B spends 1/10 of his income. But their wishes are likely to come true because the expectations are basically reasonable. But if Student B insists on buying a set of clothes worth 1,000 yuan like Student A, then his expectations are too high and his positioning is inappropriate. If Student B really asks his family to buy him a set of clothes worth 1,000 yuan, his family will definitely not agree, and his wish will certainly not be fulfilled, which will inevitably bring him disappointment. A kind of repression, a kind of complaint, and a negative mentality. Therefore, the first step to overcome a negative mindset and cultivate a positive mindset is to “properly position yourself and have reasonable expectations.”

2. Always put “OK” first and never say “NO”. In study and life, don’t say “I can’t do it” often, say “I can do it!” more often. Having the courage to affirm yourself and believe in yourself is a manifestation of confidence, and the confidence to affirm yourself is gained through comparison. Only by discovering your own strengths through comparison can you find the support point for affirming yourself and build confidence. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. For example, students who are good at science may not necessarily be outstanding in liberal arts; students who are good at solving difficult problems may not necessarily have a high accuracy rate on easy questions; students who are smart and clever may not necessarily have the spirit of hard work and perseverance; Students who have had smooth sailing may not be mentally prepared enough for difficulties and setbacks. Therefore, only by exploring our own strengths through comparison and consciously preventing and overcoming our weaknesses can we affirm ourselves and enhance our confidence.

3. Learn to vent and overcome negative psychology. When you feel troubled, unhappy, or sad, don't keep it in your heart but find someone relevant, your friends or relatives to talk to. Even if they can't necessarily find a good solution, speaking it out can be a release that is good for the body and mind. Long-term forced suppression of emotions will make inner experiences more intense, which may lead to mental illness. There is a famous Russian saying: When one joy is shared by two people, the joy becomes two; when one pain is shared by two people, the pain becomes half. Crying is also a way to release accumulated energy and adjust the body's balance, so when you are sad and worried, it's okay to have a good cry.

4. Divert attention. When we feel negative, we might as well shift our attention from negative psychological tension and anxiety to other things to dilute or forget those unpleasant emotional reactions. If you are in a bad mood, sad, depressed or angry, it is best to take a walk in nature, listen to relaxing music, or watch a comedy movie or comics; or chat with people, participate in some public welfare work; or go shopping, buy a favorite gadget, etc., all of which can relieve a person's inner unhappiness to a certain extent. For middle school students, actively participating in extracurricular activities and enriching study life are effective ways to divert attention. Extracurricular activities for middle school students are rich in content, diverse in form, and full of the flavor of the times. They are one of the places for the development of mental health. For example, participating in various social practice activities can help you understand social reality and lay the foundation for your future adaptation to and approach to society; participating in the activities of scientific and technological groups can give full play to your potential, stimulate a wide range of interests, and enhance your hands-on and thinking abilities; participating in activities such as music, chess, calligraphy, painting, physical exercise, and outings can cultivate one's sentiments, exercise one's will, expand one's social scope, and form a cheerful and optimistic personality, as well as develop one's abilities, relieve psychological tension, and release excess "energy." It turns out that well-rounded students rarely have psychological problems.

5. Keep a sense of humor and be compassionate. Humor has a unique effect in maintaining mental health. It can relax a tense mind, relieve repressed emotions, ease interpersonal tensions, get rid of embarrassing situations, and reduce anxiety. Liven up the atmosphere and clear up misunderstandings. There are many ways to express humor, such as deliberately making jokes, telling humorous stories or witticisms, doing funny actions, etc. However, humor does not necessarily make people laugh, but more often it inspires people to think. To become a person with a sense of humor, you should first cultivate your optimistic and cheerful character, strong will, develop an attitude of not worrying about things, and have firm faith in the future. Secondly, we should actively engage in creative learning and labor to increase knowledge, improve our cultivation, and cultivate our wit. Humor can relieve tension, and sympathy can relieve people's negative emotions and turn hostility into friendship. Pestalozzi once said: "With love and sympathy, you can save people who are confused and frightened." When someone offends you in life, as long as you can understand their situation, think more about the good side, and think that there are reasons and excusable circumstances, you can alleviate your anger and unhappiness. So we should cultivate love and compassion.